A WASTE OF MANHOOD

A WASTE OF MANHOOD

“Young lady, are you familiar with the news that the Chinese authorities seized a cargo ship that sailed from Nigeria with 7,200 refrigerated penises? I ask myself why single ladies in Nigeria have not gathered to stage a riot”

“Just like the Aba Women Riot of 1929?”

“Exactly! I mean, the number of unmarried women today is alarming. Yet potential organs are being shipped to another man’s land as what, meat? What a waste of natural, human, God-given creation that would have made many ladies happy. No wonder many of you are on the edge every now and then. Hm, 7,200! And they even tagged it ‘Organ Harvesting' can you imagine. Is it a plant?

As usual, a committee has been set up to investigate this illicit act. Wait, it was first condemned. That is not the end of my point. Young lady, have you visited a prison in Nigeria? I don’t advise you to. If you see able-bodied men locked up, waiting for trial for over 10 years, more so for a crime they did not commit, you will organize that riot immediately! See, many of them were locked up by politicians who show how wide their agbada can be. If you challenge them, they make a phone call. Wait, they slap your face first then make the call. If your mother is prayerful enough, they can unknowingly drop non-charges against you.

Can I ask if you are married?”

“No, I am not yet married”

"You see what I have been shouting about? Those manhoods in prison, if they are released, do you know how singlehood would drop with a reign of happiness all around? Think of it as well my dear. Your generation is too comfortable. Boys want to get high and girls want to service these high beings for money, for ego!!!! Small small the highness is frying your brains and I wonder how you people cope. Even my generation is no better. Imagine people who got scholarships in those days, they are the ones holding on to positions as if it is a do or die affair. See that agbaya that refused to reverse for us to drive out of the street in peace. Was it his father that built the road? In fact, I am tired. How do you say it these days?”

“My tired is tired abi?”

“Exactly! Is your own not tired? Anyway, I wish you the best young lady. And if you don’t mind, you can do small weekend for me. We are all hustlers you know…”

The birth of this one-sided conversation was the sight of an Aboki riding an overloaded motorcycle. He could barely ride forward and the older man blurted out “Look at this able-bodied man wanting to kill himself all for how much, N500 0r N1000. If his bones break now that money will not help in any way. The way we waste manhood in this country is amazing…

Don’t Forget to be Honest!

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